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You can't. Being a lesbian is about how she feels about women, or one particular woman, and about herself.
Actually there are many seperate questions behind this one question:
- does she love you?
- is she attracted to you?
- does she want to be in a marriage with you?
- does she love someone else? (man or woman)
- is she attracted to someone else? (man or woman)
- is she having sex with someone else? (man or woman)
- does she see herself as lesbian?